I woke up this morning with a feeling on my spirit to write my heart out. I don’t really care about what anyone has to say about my personal feelings. They are mine and I am the only one who has to walk around with feelings of not being wanted, taken advantage of, and not being aknowledged to name a few of them. I decided on the new day I was granted and write down my feelings. I said I will aknowledge my own feelings and write them down daily so I can address them on my own. I decided to take initiative in my own life to be in the driver seat. There has been times where my intuition was telling me a person was not being honest or I needed to end the friendship, I ended up worse off not listening to my intuition at that very moment. With everyday that has led me to this day I have learned to listen to my gut or intuition to guide me instead of what a person is trying to convince me of. By feeling and being logical about a situation I am able to wise up. By wise up I mean listen to my higher self instead of what a person is trying to convince me of. For years I have allowed myself to believe my mother and sister really had the best of intentions for me. I had to be showed on numerous occasions. One incident that stands out is when I turned 16 I got a job and started to save money for my senior year of high school. When I went to ask my mother if I could have some of my money she told me there was nothing there. That experience was a wake up call on my life to never trust my mother with any money. I was devistated and hurt. Especially since my mother had me giving money to my sister while I worked during the summer and my sister stayed home to watch my younger siblings while my mother worked. I also felt blindsided by my mother not even mentioning her actions to me until I asked for my money. I never really understood why my mother treated my sister and I differently. Despite her actions I decided to attend college in state nearby to help my mother with my brothers. After my whereabouts being controlled and my mother not giving me my child support during my freshman year of college, I decided to move out and demand my child support. She was upset that I decided tp stand up for myself. It felt good but displeased my mother. I moved from there with a friend then to m grandmothers home. From there the resentment got stronger and stronger from my mother. Apparently I was not supposed to make my own decisions unless my mother approved. I had to come to a point where her feelings about my life did not matter because it was my life not hers. Slowly, I began to take my power back. If it upset my mother, then so be it.